Friday, 18 December 2009


This isn't my final draft, but I'm thinking I'm sending this off to Stepanie Meyer. :)

Dear Ms Meyer,

I’m going to be blunt. Your ‘twilight’ series is easily the worst piece of literature I’ve ever come across. Ernest Hemmingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald and J.K Rowling.

When I was reading the first book in your collection, it got to the stage when halfway through I lost the will to live. Not in the ‘I want to be a vampire and live forever in an un-dead kind of way’, in a sort of ‘I would rather tear out my own eyes and slowly bleed to death than read another word of this shit’.

Reasons why your book is shit: you cannot write, Meyer, you just can’t. Face it. I understand you want to write from the point of view of a whiny teenage girl (which, to be fair, you do very well, Bella is whiny and incredibly annoying, which many teenage girls are) but a whiny teenage girl who uses words such as ‘irrevocably’. The only person I know to talk like that has much more sense than to get turned on by dead guys. You have over-used your thesaurus; quite a few of your sentences make no sense. I’d find you an example, but quite simply I can’t be fucked to get up. J Also, you use the word ‘and’ way to much ‘and I felt this, and Edward did this and then Edward did that and and and…’ etc. Also, well done for ruining vampires for the world. They used to be scary but cool villans. Now they're gay little creatures that sparkle a bit in the sun. They are supposed to catch fire. That's way more fun.
I’d also like to point out Bella comes across as a participant of necrophilia. She only seems to be interested in guys who are super powered vampires or werewolves who never put their shirt on.

I’m writing you this letter to ask you for my time back. I’m never going to get this time back I’ve spent wasting reading your bollocks, Stephanie, but if you could find some way to give me my time back that’d be much appreciated.

Yours Sincerely, Catherine Barkley, aged 17 years and 10 months

Monday, 5 October 2009

Ill. Again.

I am sick.
I am sick of always being sick.
I am sick of music videos which I replace irritating adverts with.
I am sick of my many many typos.
I am sick of my brother's best friend always giving me attitude when he is always in my house.
I am sick of scrubs re-runs.
I am sick of never having any appetite.
I am sick of my cat dribbling on me or my food when I actually try to eat.
I am sick of this whole application to uni process.
I am sick of my dreams getting crushed all the time.
I am sick of my mind constantly doubting what I do or trying to work out what I've done wrong.
I am sick of terminal cancer and kidney stones.
I am sick of crying so much I cannot seem to stop.

I' m just a little bit sick of life right fucking now.

Saturday, 26 September 2009


I went to North Wales for the week with 2 English teachers and 15 other pupils. This was nice, I got on with pretty much everyone actually, and that was nice. I won the "ginger wanabee" award, and the professional poets and teachers (and a few of the students) really liked me poem. My mum didn't so much, but I can understand that.

The Embrace When I was young, I would find them sometimes, standing at the top of the mountain of stairs hugging. I would feel left out, and my little hands would clutch at their legs. I wanted to be a part of the moment; but I ruined theirs instead. He would march off. She would smile, absently, and ruffle my hair. Today I have to sense to leave them to their moment. They stand at the top of a shrunken hill. I watch them from a distance: She clutches his waist. His arms hang limp by his sides.

Actually pretty happy with this. This is unusual for me. :)

Anywho, here's a series of photos
you can't see it, but Will's put a crab on his crotch. The joke is: "Will's got crabs". It was very funny :) Harry looks really impressed, no jokes.

Will liked to steal my camera to take pictures of everyone's arses. There was a series of butts that followed this picture. I won't put them up here. But they are on facebook, if you really want to see them...

The hoodie was infamous. Will looks better in it that I do.

Elenid was cold. I gave her my hoodie. Will kept going to give her kissed and cuddles, then realising she wasn't me, then stopping in his tracks, then being all "stop confusing meee!! D:" I lol'd. wouldn't have lol'd so much if he'd realised afterwards tho :P

This just looked poetic, and proffesional. It was then followed by this:
They went swimming in the cold, cold river. It was a race across. Will won. Andy got annoyed and splashed him. They had a conversation about cold bollocks for a while. To be fair, I would have joined them, but I was wearing white underwear, and no way in hell was I going see through.

Overall: good times.

(I'll do P some other time, peoples)

Sunday, 6 September 2009


God, I am so ILL :(
I still think it's the iron thing. I've been feeling sick for ages, and this morning I threw up a nice big pile of bile. By this morning I mean about 5 am. Dad loved it, he was woken up. So was Lorraine, but apparenty she was already awake, so it's all good. Been feeling reeeally sick ever since too. Yay. I told mum this. She sorta glanced over, made a vague, non-commital sound and carried on watching the news. So nice to know I'm cared about.

Well I am by one of my parents to be fair. When I was done vomiting dad bought me a glass of water and a bucket and sat in my room until I was asleep. He even held my hand so I knew he was still there. Rosie the dog felt like she wanted to be a part of the moment and put her paw on top of the pile of hands. Then she settled down on the end of my bed. She's lovely. I love that dog. :)

Oh, faceborg does "fancheck" now. Unfortunately, faceborg dislikes uploading any of my pictures, so here it is here.
Interesting stuff. Well done, Hazel. You numba 1! =D

I'm seriously going to be sick. I mean it. The back of my throat feels like it's burning. Might go sit in the toilet for a bit...

...well that was fun. Just sat in my toilet and retched quite violently for a bit. My body was gettingf all angry, it wanted to be sick, but it just wasn't man enough to do it....
what a pussy.

You all needed to hear that, blatantly.

Dani, if you're reading this tonight, expect a phonecall tomorrow, I may not be going in.
First day back is always the good day of the year, everyone missed each other, everyone's back with their shiny new things. By the second day, the novelty is gone, noone cares anymore, and it's just a new day. I'm going back to the loo for a bit...
..still nothing. Well this really is a load of fun.

aaanywho, lets do O now, so I don't need to keep telling you guise about my bathroom breaks.

Oasis - Wonderwall
(it was stop crying your heart out for a while, but the local police edited that song as the backing song for a young girl meeting a paedophile, and it kinda ruined it for me. Apparently it's a true story, and the girl was brutally raped. That song was a pretty bad choice if you ask me. 'oh, stop crying about your violation, you silly girl, it'll be okay if you stop moaning.')

Obadiah Parker - Hey Ya.
(One of my favourite songs ever. This bloke got famous via youtube, and he's excellent. It's the best cover of anything I've ever heard. His real name is Matt Weddle.)

Tuesday, 1 September 2009



lulz. Fallout boy live on youtube is fun. (: Especially when they bring on guests. And when I don't turn the volume down on my headphones it's even more fun. Still, I liked Journey's "Don't stop believin'. It's the one that everyone knows. but i am afraid to press play on the cover fall out boy have done. That girlie filming the thing has a reeeally loud high-pitched voice. Oh wait, it was her friend. Sorry. The person filming it expressed this first thing in the comments. I pity her.

What's new? Oh yes. Finished my course of iron tablets. And what happens? No appetite for several days in a row, so I live on cups of tea and the odd dijestive biscuits, they're all I can manage. I should but rich tea instead. They better. (:

This means yaaay, I get to go back to schedule another blood test. These aaallways make me faint. Mind you, the repulsion to food + the lack of food in my system = faintey Catherine.

I should be making the most of these last couple of days of the holiday, I go back friday. Stupid C.R.E.W. :( Instead, this picture pretty much sums me up.


Nine Inch Nails - Hurt.
Trent Reznor has a reeeally haunting voice. I love it. (:

Noah and the Whale - 5 Years Time
Hear this song, you'll be singing it for days. It's a happy, catchy song. It's lush (:

Saturday, 29 August 2009


I went on holiday with my mother and my brother. To West Wales. I love that photo. I took it. I'm proud. :)

To sum up the holiday for each of us:
My mother hates the combination of iPods and cars because no one speaks to her. She kept making me turn it off and talk to her. When the conversation died, I put iPod back in my ears. She didn't like that. She made me take it out again. She had nothing to say. I was not amused.
Adam got attacked by wasps. And got stung. and moaned a lot. It was his finger. Apparently if you aggravate wasps they release a magic chemical that gets their gang to giv u beatinz. This is not good news, people. We've realised man vs wasp in battle is a futile effort on our part. Oh well.
I read a book. It was quite good. Called the season of the witch. I found it in a service station, and it was the only book I could afford. It was between that and a Jade Goody Autobiography. It was the lesser of two evils, and I enjoyed this lesser evil more than I was expecting to, which is always a nice surprise. Natasha Mostert is a very good writer, I like her style.

We also went to a "leisure park" which had caves, dinosaurs and Llamas. And goats, but they kinda went with the Llamas.
To the B&B, it was lovely. There were Teddy-Bears on the beds. Mine was a Canadian with a hat. I named him Ike.

We also went to look at beaches, but not actually go to the beaches. I don't know why. Adam was in a huff or something. Or "tired" which is code for "I'm in a huff. I hate you."

He missed this. He was waiting in the car.

The next day, we went to Oakwood (where the army of wasps was waiting for us)
This was okay. I used to love Theme Parks, and used to enjoy being fearless on rides. I've since discovered that having no fear on 'scary' rides is no fun. There is no adrenaline rush. I Went on Hydro, knowing someone died on it and I felt Nada. No "This ride wasn't safe then, it might not be safe now."
How boring. I've decided I will go bungee jumping. This could be fun. Vertigo was fully booked, This was as close to bungee jumping as you can get at Oakwood. Oh wells.

Then we went to Grandma's house. She lives in Essex. 300 miles away from where we were staying. There were epic traffic ques. The journey took 9 hours. Adam got poorly on the way aswell from drinking too much artificial milk.Add Image

It was all good though, cause Essex also means Eleanor! Yaay Eleanor. :)
There were no photos, We were far too busy shopping in Colchester to take photos, gosh. :p

Madina Lake - Pandora

MGMT - Kids

Muse - Map Of The Problematique
(They use this on EVERY Doctor Who confidential episode. I swear. I don't mind. I love the song)

I couldn't be bothered with music tonight, people.

On another note Panic at the disco's blog has gone. It is no more. Damn it, they may not be anymore, but they did used to be. Ryan and Jon cannot deny me that. I noticed a while ago, but I just got all pissed off. They suck. Look at them sucking.

Who am I kidding? I still like them cause they were in the best band ever. Damn sentimentality. Liost respect for Ryan what with the drugs allegation and all. Stupid drugs. I hate drugs. Aaaalso I didn't like their new song "change" a great deal. "New Perspective" however, by the remaining members of panic is better. Actually, I cannot stop listening to it. Is good. :)

Sunday, 23 August 2009


So erms, I got my AS level results on Thursday. That was fun.
By which I mean it really wasn't.
I got a D in Drama.
Psychology, Classics, English, Drama.

This was beyond upsetting for me, because it was the day the dream died I guess.
I cannot be an actress. Because I am shite apparently.
I didn't think I was good, but I didn't think I was shite either.
Kinda avarage, but I thought I could be good if I worked hard and put everything into it.

Yeah, I was wrongg... Yays.

I guess the dream has been treated by the imaginary paramedics in my brain tho.
Cause i've convinced myself that even though I am the worst stage actress doing AS level drama, I may not be the worst film actress.

So er...yeah, I'm living in denial, but it's stopping uberdepression so it's an okay solution for now.

On a happier note....

Last sunday me and my friends went to the beach. It was lush. :)
Computer's not the biggest fan of me uploading photos atm tho, which sucks. But there we go. That's what you get when you have a mother who turns it off at the plug along with other things...

Blogger seems to let me do it okay tho.

Weather was a bit of a bitch, but it was warm enough

But Caitlin out a bit here, this is the reason I don't photography it up.

It's stopped uploading stuff now. How annoying...

L... L, L, L...

L is a name of an ex-friend I keep worrying I'm turning into (Tallie, not shortie, ppl.)

Musically nao..

Laura Marling - My Manic And I
(It's one of those Dani's mum's car songs, I got Adam to get it for me, and it's lush. I also like cross your fingers)

Linkin Park - New Divide
(Transformers 2 promotional song, and I can't stop listening to it.)

Lisa Hannigan - I don't know
(Free on iTunes, baby)

Little Boots - Stuck on Repeat